Stop calling me fat

I just recently reconnected with an old friend I hadn’t talked to in years. I sent her some photos, a late Christmas card and all kinds of news about all the things I’ve been doing here in L.A. I talked about my script being optioned, the producers I’ve been meeting and where “Plastic” is as far as development and casting. (I can’t really go into much detail right here because nothing is set in stone.) After hearing all my news and seeing my pictures, her very first comment was: “How come you’ve gain so much weight?” She said it nicely and I’m sure really didn’t mean to hurt my feelings. She even went on to say that she gained a lot of weight herself.

This got me thinking that we women are so good at putting our fellow women down. Should I remind you she’s a friend? She named her youngest daughter Julia because we were so close when we were younger. I have no doubt in my mind she didn’t mean to hurt me. But, why is it that we do this to each other? I had many more exciting things happening in my life than what the scale says. I also happen to be happily married. Why does it matter that I’m a size 10? Does being a few pounds overweight really make you useless? Does that mean your voice shouldn’t count in the world? Why do we do this to ourselves? I’m sitting here not being able to concentrate on my writing because I’m thinking I should be working out.


We’ve gotten really good at sabotaging each other. It seems like no matter what you’re doing in life, other women won’t respect you unless you’re thin. Why is that? Is fat really all that awful and scary? Do we forget that we’re biologically designed to retain fat so we nourish babies?


Oh, yeah, babies. That seems to be second thing everyone wants me to do with my life. Nobody seems to care about my career, they just want to know when I’m having babies, and how come I’m so fat. I feel like I could find the cure for cancer and people would still be asking where the babies are, and how come I won’t go on a diet.



Women everywhere, I ask all of you: When are we going to stop sabotaging each other? When are we going to start celebrating each other for what we’ve accomplished with our minds and not our looks? When are we going to stop being so cruel to one another?

And people still ask why I’ve written three screenplays about women and body image.